1) LI "Scoffs... This machine is like broken" or "I need maintenance"
2) MC "I.. I can help you with that!"
2) MC "Ah!
LI" ...."
1) W "Yo dude"
2) W "I want to get a refund for this twinkie, because it tried to attack me..."
1) MC "Ok ok ok, here's your...
2) MC "...money back!"
W "Thank you very much sir!"
2) JB "Baby baby baby OWWW!" (or "AAH")
1) LI "Watch out behind you!"
1) MC "AHA! Fear me, monster!"
2) LI "Here.. Help me out next time!"
MC "Oh okay..."
{(I was thinking of inserting the extra food transforming into mutant scenes here))
1) MG " Where did all of these cheese come from?"
2) MG *mumbles* "Stupid cheese. Stupid Sampson. He should clean this up instead of me..."
1) MG "Too much cheese oozing out! Get back in there!"
1) MC "Omg, omg omg! We're gonna die! We're dead meat! We're...!" *notices cheese spray bottles*
2) MC "Prepare to meet your doom, monster!"
1) LI "Lame!"
MC + Monster "..."
Argh, I had this whole long-winded comment typed up and I deleted it by accident. :/ So I'll just be brief this time...
ReplyDeleteThe panels look great! They're nice and clear. The only thing that may need to be changed is the 1) MC "I wonder what is ll that ruckus behind us..." panel, because of the 180 degree rule. The view switches from behind the characters to in front of them. It doesn't bother me personally, but it might be confusing to people that aren't familiar with what's happening. Maybe you could show it to some other people and see?
For the food mutating scenes, they probably could be inserted even earlier than that (like, directly after the cheese first crawls away) and that way we could sort of gradually build up to the cheese monster.
I'm also wondering if we should add a few brief shots of the mutant food attacking customers to follow sometime after the mutating scenes. What do you guys think?